"If Vibes Could Kill
" How to Handle Those Difficult
Dynamics
A question I get often from clients is "What's the best
way of dealing with participants who are resistant or outright hostile?"
When I ask them "How many participants is that in a typical
audience?" the answer is usually "one is enough,"
or "none yet, but I know I'll get them!" Although
our fear of hostility in an audience is real, it may take on bigger-than-life
proportions. The best presenters are authentic in front of
an audience, and therefore personally exposed. That, I believe,
is the source of the fear.
I cut my teeth with resistant audiences a few years ago. I designed
and presented mandatory classes in supervisory skills for law enforcement
professionals in one big-city department. Imagine the crossed arms,
squeaking leather and flat affect as the cops leaned back in their
chairs and gave me the "vibe!"
This three-year experience boosted my abilities to deal effectively
with resistance. I grew thicker skin, became more detached and better
grounded. Of course, it was also essential to know my stuff
and present with authority and reason. The experience was extremely
helpful to my development as a presenter.
Resistant dynamics can be found in any audience. Here are three
essential techniques to address it effectively.
Three Steps to Deal With Difficult Dynamics
1. Check Yourself.
Most of our fear as presenters is actually about us. Ask yourself:
What am I feeling about this audience? Why? What's the worst
that could happen? How can I get internally balanced and grounded
before getting up in front of them?
Prepare yourself emotionally and physically. Make sure you've
had enough to eat, and plenty of water. If you find yourself going
"on stage" expecting the worst and/or not being prepared
for as many questions and challenges as possible, you do yourself
and your audience a miserable disservice.
2. Don't Try to "Fix" People.
Your goal is to present to the best of your ability. It is not your
goal to "fix" people's behaviors. In my experience,
a participant acting in a hostile or resistant way is a symptom
of underlying problems and anxieties in the group. Even if that
particular person were to magically disappear, the resistant energy
will likely be taken up and voiced by someone else. Acknowledge
and respect the dynamics in the room. Detach from them.
3. Present as if Everyone Were Uncommitted.
I borrow from Don Pfarrer's book, Guerilla Persuasion, for
this third tip. I've found it incredibly helpful, and so have
my clients.
Assume that in every audience, there are those who are friendly
to you and your message, those that are hostile, those that are
indifferent and those that are simply uncommitted. Addressing the
Uncommitted segment provides a sensible strategy to deal with the
many simultaneous crosscurrents in the audience.
You'll only be able to reach the Uncommitted by speaking in
tones of moderation, patience, good cheer and reason. You won't
have to feel apprehensive about waves of animosity coming your way,
nor tempted to cut corners by assuming support where it might not
exist.
All Audience Segments Benefit When You Focus on the Uncommitted.
| Audience Segment |
What Do They
Want from the Experience? |
Dangers of Focusing
Only on This Segment? |
How This Segment
Benefits When You Focus on the Uncommitted |
| "Friendlies" |
Satisfaction, affinity. Perhaps a pep-talk. |
Too easy - you may assume too much. |
Their knowledge and commitment is deepened. |
| "Hostiles" |
To see you fail. To hear you say something ill-natured
or wrong. |
Increases your own nervousness and defensiveness.
You may come off abrasively and unlikable. |
They experience human respect, openness and reason
from you (and are likely to mirror the behavior.) |
| "Indifferents" |
To be left alone and unchanged. |
To the exclusion of the rest of the audience,
you may tie yourself up into knots trying get a response. |
They may get the message, while not being hammered
by you. |
| "Uncommitteds" |
To experience a reasoned, well-thought-out, good-natured
exposure to the issues. |
NONE! |
They get the best of YOU: affinity and reason.
YOU won't cut corners by assuming support where it might
not exist.
YOU are forced to construct and present your message thoroughly,
persuasively and with confidence.
|
The bottom line is: KNOW YOUR STUFF. Be ready for questions and
challenges. By checking yourself, not trying to "fix"
audience members, and focusing on the Uncommitted, you take great
strides towards more resiliency and effectiveness as a presenter.Guila
Muir provides Presentation Skills Development to individuals and
groups. For more information see www.guilamuir.com/presentation.html.
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About Guila Muir & Associates
Guila Muir and Associates is the premiere Train-the-Trainer firm
on the West Coast. Using participatory adult education since 1981,
Guila Muir & Associates has developed the skills of hundreds
of trainers and facilitators in business and government. Enhance
your organization's ability to transmit information the way adults
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or call us at (206) 725-1994.


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